Kaffee HAG

Yep, you heard me, this place cracks me up every time I pass it. It’s a Konditorei, cake shop and/or confectioner’s, where you go for your K & K (Kaffee and Kuchen, coffee and cake). Personally, I prefer fun sized Snickers (cheaper, fewer calories, and you can have them in the privacy of your own home)...though we have K each morning naturally, and once in great while, K. Anyway, Kaffee HAG seems a little heavy on the meringue and marzipan stuff—no thanks.


In 1906 Ludwig Roselius, having obtained a patent for a decaffeination process, founded the first company in the world to put decaffeinated coffee on the market...it was called Kaffee HAG, HAG is merely an abbreviation for Handels-Aktien-Gesellschaft (publicly traded company). They also sell regular coffee, in addition to decaffeinated (not to be confused with coffee substitute made from barley malt, or as they quaintly call it here, Muckefuck).


Kaffee HAG is owned by Kraft, as are Milka and Toblerone. In 1903 farmer’s son James Lewis Kraft brought his wagon to Chicago, where he established a mobile cheese trade with 60 bucks. In 1927 Die Kraft Cheese Company was founded in Hamburg, it dealt mainly in imported English cheese.


In 1937 "Velveta" (developed by J. L. Kraft himself) was launched in Germany, and supposedly it quickly became a very popular Schmelzkäse (soft and/or processed cheese). You couldn’t prove it by me though, I haven’t seen any...but then again we haven't been fishing, because that would require 80 hours of instruction to get our hands on a fishing license. What’s the only thing worse than knowing your nice Swiss chocolate is distributed by Kraft?...Finding out that in 1988 Philip Morris bought the whole shebang.